10 Bad Networking Etiquette Behaviours

Nightmare Networker

The following bad networking behaviours are really the biggest never dos. They guarantee you a very miserable reputation. At the very least, no one will ever invite you back. At worst, well it’s up to the repeat offender.

1) Bad breath – That will keep someone a couple of steps back. All good prospects will go far, far away like a fairy tale.

2) Too pushy – Enough is enough. Someone has to go away, you let them go away. Stop chasing the poor guy or gal. It might not be you and it might. So what?

3) Following someone around – Is that person in puppy love? Unless he or she has a cold nose, long floppy ears and barks, don’t expect to be petted.

4) Butting in on conversations – Two or more people are having a conversation and someone charges in and makes introductions and simply takes over the conversation.

6) Back biting – Putting someone or a company or a product down maliciously is never good form. This will come biting the biter right back on the backside. No one will ever want to associate with you unless they are of the same ilk.

7) Bad language – Foul language in a cocktail party full of genteel folk? Are you mad? Might get that offender tossed out.

8) Badly dressed – It’s only good manners to dress up well, or at the very best in good taste for the occasion – business dress for business networking and party dress for party times. Coming to a networking party reeking of manure and dressed in jeans will not make you very popular but very well known.

9) Being very late – May not be very good for some networking functions because you’d be a big distraction. Also, it’s disrespectful.

10) Loud mouthed – Boorish behaviour is totally out of this world and out of kind acknowledgements too. Wonder why eyes turn away from such people?

My Disappearing Act

There must be a million ways to get away from that networking nightmare following me around and not offend anyone else but here is what I began with. After trying various methods, it worked. But alas, he still didn’t get the message.

1) Polite behaviour – I excused myself. This not so gentlemanly person followed. Now, was he suffering from some puppy love infection?

2) Turned my attention to someone else – He was immediately in my way and in my face. Words and saliva was spraying away in my face – bad breath included.

3) Excused myself determinedly and spoke to someone – Nightmare networker butted in. Both me and new person are very annoyed and moved away in opposite directions.

4) Grabbed my arm and stuffed business card in my hand – I nearly screamed through a forced smile. I told him to stay away. He gave stupid sneering laugh and tried to sell me his latest and greatest mlm ‘opportunity’. He followed as I dropped his card walked away.

5) Thought up plan – I sat between two gentlemen and smiled at them, “Some help guys?” Like clockwork nightmare appeared and his bad language to these gentlemen got himself booted out of the premises.

And would you know it? That nutcase was milling about outside the building chatting away on his cell phone. I don’t know which mlm company he’s got into but woe betide anyone trying to keep this person in check. Well, all’s well that ends well. My two very gallant and new gentlemen friends escorted me outside and he took off in his car immediately never to be seen or heard of again. It’s great to be relieved of any nightmare especially the live living networking kind.

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Listening Before Acting

Art of Listening

Yes, it’s an art. Like in the martial arts, it takes discipline to observe, listen and ask the right questions. It then takes practice of the real thing for many years and many hours in a day to excel. You offer the love and trust of the master or one who teaches you to heart and with greatest of respect. So too do you carry this ideal to the real world. In real life the true expert knows his or her worth and will observe, listen and understand before acting. As in martial arts so too we listen.

Listening to someone or reading from a book or to an audio is really to learn about the other person. You’re filling the shoes of the speaker. You are feeling the nuances, the direction of the story and whence it was derived. It is a stream of time being absorbed by you, the listener.

Art of Speaking

The speaker is the story teller. He or she is taking the stream of time, from the past whence the story began to unfold, relates it in the present and finds a place for it in the future. These are the great speeches. Listen to any of the historical orators like Socrates or Martin Luther King Jr. and you’ll be ultimately inspired right into your very soul.
 
There’s no need to tell each one to attend clubs like Toastmasters if you observe the simple rules of listening well before you speak. As you observe and fill the life of the speaker of the moment, you can relate well within the energy of the moment in return. Simply put, the better you understand the story (or question), the better you can speak your answer. And in return, your question will then become far more intelligent. We have all encountered people who appear to ask far better questions than all others in an audience. You should talk to such a person. He or she is a great listener and very likely has great answers. 
 
Listen and Speak as Mastermind

If you have noticed the reverence and silence of an enraptured audience, all have fallen into the energy of listening. Minds and energies are one. This interaction of speaker and listeners has become one great mastermind.

That is why a great story being told well can enrapture the audience. Measure the resonance and you’ll be astounded that everyone are in sync with each other. It’s as though all the energies of mind, body and soul are vibrating as one, which they are. Remember the edification of religious sermons that we are one, we are brethren and we are god’s children? Since we are made in the image of god, we are all alike. We have the powers that are alike.

When we listen intently, the speaker speaks with clarity. We have engaged our energies without noise, but understanding of each other’s wants and needs.

Other Forms of Noise or Listening

Noise is everywhere. There are advertisements, books, newspapers, televisions, cars, dogs, industry, etc. All these noises have their own character and speak their own language. However, it is unfortunate that to try and be heard above the crowd, they shout their loudest. Lights try to shine their brightest and ads try to make themselves grab your attention even if you don’t ever want to know they are there. That tends to make us shout even louder of become stimulation deaf. We’ve often refused to listen anymore to anything because of over stimulation.

Do we listen to the shopper asking questions anymore? The sales person is likely not to listen and brush you off to the complaints department, who never really listens anyway. Just fill in the complaints form they say. We don’t spend a lot of time or attention to read the instructions and ask really incoherent questions. Ever wonder why you often get equally dumb answers?

You see, dumbing down in our senses gets dumbing down in response. It’s a vicious cycle.

Try using the art of listening and the art of speaking and you’ll see the fantastic results of the perfect interaction. Remember to listen twice before you speak just once.

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Trolls Are Conspiracies And Hate Christmas

Internet Trolls hiding behind keyboards

Who are these networking or internet trolls? They are either nutcases or idiots who love to cause pain to others while hiding behind some dark computerized cave. And then you have those who are literally well organized trouble makers whose only cause is to spread dissention, fear and doubt. I wonder who pays them? They insult and we should all do the same to them by shining more light their way and on the truth of what truth seekers provide. Trolls, by and large are rude and cowardly. They claim to bring out truth but lie everywhere and about everything.

Beware, the successful truth seekers. These creatures that hate daylight also loathe the mere scene of joy. You bring light and ease the pain and suffering to as many people as possible into the world and be assured they will come. My son and his friends call them trolls. On the web, these younger generations actually do not like them at all. Sure, they love a good laugh now and then. But the trolls’ intent is to spread discontent and spoil any and all good news. There’s nothing funny about that.

Find a great man or woman giving the truth about solving their life’s problems and teaching them to do it all on their own, and sure enough, here they come. Snide remarks appear in the news. Newspapers carry snippets of such tactless malcontent. The internet receives snide remarks and links to content intended to hurt and injure the good newsmaker. How is it that these pieces of ‘mal-content’ slip through unchecked? News aggregators insist they scan and ban poor or bad content. Yet these slip through or are they actually allowed?

Now, why do I not link such pieces of content as more ‘hard’ proof? Well, it get a little difficult online because these snippets along with their victims’ messages do not stay long on the web. They are dismissed very quickly. But you know and understand what I mean. And you know trolls exist to spoil Christmas for those who want them and create them for others.

Bring On More Light

Trolls hate light of truth. So, let’s shine more light on them. These trolls only real power is to spread dissention and doubt. When you see the result of their comments on individuals who blow the whistle on big corporations or government misdoings, you will begin why they are trying to cover up those issues. Are they hiding the truth and diverting the truth from the readers’ eyes? “Who paid them?” is what you may ask. Then you may see idiots who want to be @#$%^! Or perhaps these same ones, on other reports either online or in the newspapers or even in a speech, you begin to wonder who they may be. They seem so well organized!

In fact, probably the most effective cure is to counter them at their own game. The teens I know of actually go out of their way to gang together and literally attack these troll writers online. They have found these tactics very effective. The trolls literally try to defend themselves instead of attacking their intended victims. They get drowned out and sometimes flushed out of their hiding. And reading those posts and comments can be very enlightening to who they are. You as an individual can do the same and I have found others will follow your lead.

Claim your right to truth and free speech. Whenever you see a great report or a speech or an online piece of work, give your support. It’s this kind of positivity that drives all these negative troll work into the garbage and deep dark smelly pits where they belong. I, we, and my friends have been trolls and their masters targets for far too long.

Happy Christmas every day to the networking trolls.

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Phony Mlm Companies

Pyramid Scheme

I’m not mentioning names. Mlm or network marketing or affiliate marketing companies or businesses have their less than savoury ones and should not even be allowed to operate, that’s true. They border on those illegal ponzy or pyramid schemes in the way they treat their distributors and clients. In some countries, they have even been known to vanish into thin air leaving many unfulfilled financial obligations.

Sometimes one gets horror stories of repeated illegal activities like not paying their distribuotrs for sales, not sending client purchased products and not replacing or indeed refunding for damaged goods. It can take such a long time before authorities can get to deal with them. These are the ones that give legitimate, honest mlm companies a bad name.

Phony Mlm Distributors

Well you do get them in any industry. They use a well known legitimate mlm company and then con unwitting victims out of significant amounts of money. Alternatively, there are those registered mlm distributors who are really no better.

They call it creative selling but they are really selling a bunch of lies about the income you can make, etc. In fact these smooth talkers have been known to sell you totally unwanted and unneeded items. Remember the stories of garages full of useless, overpriced and outdated stuff? Talk about giving genuine mlm distributors who care about servicing their clients well and being in business with new distributors a bad name.

Phony Mlm Prospects and Clients

They can be real nightmares themselves. They too lie and cheat in so many ways. Many mlm distributors know of many people who stand them up on meetings and appointments. They do so without even the courtesy of a phone call.

Then there are those who take products and refuse to return or pay for them. Others simply order goods and cancel their credit cards. They also make illegitimate complaints of false billing and other complaints against the mlm company or distributor.

Some of these prospects are just mean because they think they can be. Many use the words of false reports and total ignorance of the truth. There are those who still claim the mlm is an illegal business. But when asked to elaborate their assertions, they simply look stunned and cannot.

Bad Press Are From The Few

Most mlm companies, mlm distributors and mlm prospects are decent people. They all treat each other with respect. Most bad press stem from the few. Many are deliberate like news reports with being sensational about misdemeanours of some kind that will sell more papers.

People who are mean are usually the ones who have an axe to grind with anything remotely successsful, a.k.a. losers. Others are simply ignorant of the facts and repeat what someone said or something they have read about in the newspapers.

The claim that many people fail at mlm is true when you take the total number of people getting into the business. However, the truth is that the ten percent or less that actually go to work on the business do see some success. And the spectacular success stories belong to those who work according to a prescribed method to their success.

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Etiquette of Networking

Bill Bartmann is a Superstar With Great Etiquette of Networking

“I’ll just die if I get to talk to that billionaire guy!” I used to be such a desperate character totally devoid of the etiquette of networking. Since then, I’ve discovered that it is your character, your will stemming from learning to grow and mature that attracts the right people to you, and vice versa.

Looking back in time, this is personal development from when I started. Eventually, someone will come up to you and you wonder about the personal mastery you’ve developed or want to learn from a certain powerful individual.

I realized that I am, I become the etiquette of networking I present.

In fact I have found that something far more valuable always happens. It is the relationship I build with them. This is long term. I make a friend of this person because I demonstrate that I am attuned what he or she is about. This VIP then reciprocates because you somehow have the vibes to stand out from the run of the mill crowd. Both your vibes somehow connect. How good is it to have business connections or ideas from this person, or will it continue even further?

Think You Can

“How I wish I can have a one to one with that super wealthy expert. I’m sure he can teach me boatloads of tricks to make me more money…”

We’ve all been in that “I wish position” at one time or another. Do you really want it strongly enough that you’d do what it takes to get to pick that person’s brains? Well, if you’re still wishing, you’ve just failed. Time to change that.

The Superstar

Networking With Bill Bartmann. Grainy picture was taken by an overly excited amateur networker like me back when...

You and 2 score or more people had just sat through an hour long presentation of an acknowledged genius of the industry you are in. All of you were so inspired, that person received a standing ovation when his or her delivery was over.

So why did you remain glued to your seat. Are you hoping this guy or gal will simply pick you out of crowd and give you the benefits of all their years of success?

Yes, why indeed.

Why the Disappearing Act?

Have you ever noticed a very curious thing right after that speech or seminar? Customarily, final questions will be asked for and that person literally runs for cover and disappears thereafter. It may be because that person is shy of publicity. Maybe it was company protocol. Maybe they were short on time. Perhaps the bathroom calls in the worst possible way.

But most likely, it is because he or she has simply had it with hangers-on and people who approach them demanding free information. You know them; they who whine and then cry for that person to solve their business problems. 

Getting the Right Attention

Well before the end of the program, you’ll want to make this person notice you. But how do you do just that? Remember you’re still a stranger. But you have the advantage of being able to focus on becoming his or her friend over the course of that seminar…

You Can Try These Steps

1) WIIFM – “What’s in it for me?” Remember this mantra (it is meant for you and the person you want to meet).

You are totally prepared to want to meet this VIP. Yes, it is important to accord such great vibes in achieving an interview or connect with him or her.

Whenever you want something from someone, you must be 100% prepared to give something of equal or greater value in return.

2) Give Positive Attention and get Positive Attention from that person during his or her presentation.

You can:

a) Come to the presentation ready to offer creative input.

b) Build Rapport with that person on stage (he or she can see everything from stage). E.g.: Eye contact, breathing rhythm, hand gestures, taking notes, sitting straight up and attentive, respond through smiles or laughter or intelligent comments or intelligent questions, be silent but totally attentive, positive body language, etc.

3) Raise your hand at the end of the presentation and ask for a contact e-mail or business card.

It does not always work (this may be a very busy person). The idea is to get a closer attention from this person.

Remember your WIIFM? What can you offer to benefit that person enough that he or she will take time off to speak with you?

a) Write a promotional article about the person or subject?

b) You want to learn more about that particular industry niche this person is such an expert of?

c) You have an idea for a business that benefits that person?

If you have been getting that person’s positive attention during the presentation, chances are he or she will reciprocate very warmly. You may be asked to speak in private or make an appointment with a secretary…

This may not work 100% of the time, but I tried it with 5 people and got 4 very positive results. In fact, keep up the rapport building and they may decide to give you a full hour of consultation free of charge!

Try it!

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Technorati Tags: Etiquette of Networking, Networking, Personal Development, Personal Mastery, Relationship

The Etiquette of networking

The first rule about networking is not just about handing out business cards to everyone and to hope they will contact you.

Effective networking is about building a relationship, whereby we can connect with each other and seek to help each other.

Etiquette of Networking rules that if we follow them, we can create an effective and ongoing relationship not only with one individual but many other people.

Tune in and Listen:

Trust your power of observation when you are speaking to someone. Let call this someone ‘partner’. Your partner will look away, or gather up possessions or even move away from you. Use your intuitive sense that it’s time to say good-bye.

Clarify Your Agenda:

You have come to the networking with the purpose of meeting people, so be honest and tell your partner that you want to wander around and meet others at the meeting.
You might also say that you need to meet at least three people before leaving the meeting.
Fulfilling your agenda serves two purposes, one is you get to do what you came to do.
Secondly gives your partner to do his/her agenda.

Referral:

To change conversation partners, ask your current partner for a referral. A referral to someone else in the room or even outside the meeting would be welcomed.
Tell your partner that you are looking for other people who are working at home and if he or she knows anyone.
Ask if your partner know anyone who is thinking about moving to a new office and explain that your company is expanding its office design services.

Ending a Conversation:

If you feel uncomfortable ending a conversation and walking away, then invite the partner to go with you. You might suggest that you both go find the host, or get a drink.

Introduce Your Partner:

Introduce your partner to some, not as a way to get rid of your partner. If the partner had mentioned to you that he or she was going to Japan and you saw someone who knew all about Japan and this would be appropriate to introduce them.

Make Connection:

As you mingle and meet people at the meeting, you get to know who does what. What a match when you go out of your way to bring people together so they can help each other.

Close & Appreciate:

One of the most memorable ways to close is to sum up the conversation and show appreciation for your partner. Shake hands and express the importance of the conversation.

Next Steps:

Say what you will do next or what you would like the partner to do next, to continue the relationship. Instead of just melting away, commit to meeting each other at the next meeting. Perhaps even share the business cards and follow up on each other.

Remember the formula:          L E A V E              N O W

Let go of the partner after five minutes, not any longer.

Explain what you came to do and be honest about it.

Act on the agenda you planned.

Veer off to talk with a referral.

Exit to another conversation or meeting someone by taking your partner with you.

Note and sum up the conversation and appreciate something your partners shared with you.

Outline the next step for your partner.

Walk purposefully after shaking your partner’s hand.

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